That is the question….isn’t it? As a bride, its probably one of the most important decisions you make. Who do you ask? How many do you have? Will it look like you picked your closest friends or did you subconsciously amass an entourage, a posse, a bad-ass crew of bridal bitches?
As a girl being asked, it’s a great honor, no doubt. But with great honor, comes great responsibility….and expense (Spiderman reference….anyone)? As soon as you are asked, do you mentally cross your fingers and hope, even pray for a inexpensive dress…that of course, “you can wear again”…haha…right.
Anyways, what does agreeing to be someone’s wedding or asking someone to be in your wedding REALLY mean? What are the expectations?
I have been a bridesmaid three times. Which is a good amount, but nothing compared to some of my friends who are “career bridesmaids”. (This is where having close guy friends saves you from a “27 Dresses” type of scenario). As a bridesmaid, I have been adequate, at best. I would say my contributions have fallen under the guise of emotional support vs hands on, in the trenches, bridal backup. I would like to think that this is because we lived in different states, but in retrospect and now as a bride…I realize I could have tried harder. I just didn’t know. It is like sitting down on the couch to watch your favorite TV show and neglecting to acknowledge the months of production that went in to that one episode.
As a bride, I have been lucky. I have six girls (yep, I went with a posse!) who have done nothing from day one, but want to help and want to help distress-ify this behemoth of a wedding process. But this is exactly where the crazy bride ups the ante on her cup of crazy. While I should be ecstatic to let go, it is a cord I cannot cut. You’re planning my bridal shower….let me bring apps…help with the dishes…I have excellent penmanship, more than happy to address invitations! Bachelorette party…I'll reserve rooms, send emails and type up itineraries….crazy, yes….true, oh SO true…to a fault.
So what is the net, net of all of this? Should you be or…not be a bridesmaid? Well the answer is a no-brainer…you of course do it! Just keep in mind to allow a large bay size window…and that might not even be big enough…for bridal insanity. Think about the friend who has asked you and what type of personality they have and account for that. Etiquette, smetiquette…what the books and the professionals say you should do…throw it out the window. Every bride is different and what she needs during this time is less of a bridal party and more of a close, supportive network of friends, which will last much longer than the year of wedding chaos. If she is head strong and “crazy” let her be involved….maybe over involved…these smaller events could be a nice distraction for her. If she is laid back and chill run with it and do your thing!
To all my ladies, they have dealt with the type-A bridal action that I have been throwing down....thanks for dealing with the nonsensical whims and actions of the crazy bride!
Next week - Wedding Weight...the Crazy Bride Timeline for Fitness
Cheers!
AC
Next week - Wedding Weight...the Crazy Bride Timeline for Fitness
Cheers!
AC
